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Myself in Public

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Men in Skirts & Women in Trousers - Front Page

This site is designed, produced and maintained by myself. Only hosted on a 3rd party server.

 

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 With gender issues I'm Egalitarian "believe in the principle that people are equal and deserve equal rights/opportunities". Androgyny, the combination of male and female characteristics.

Is that not what women ask, seek and expect these days?

 

To deny the female gender their individuality, empowerment, freedom of choice, expression etc in this modern era is mysoginist, sexist, discriminatory, even domestic violence if a partner expresses his preferred clothing preference for his partner. Not so for men though.

Clothes have no gender in this era. Certainly not for women by society but I say not for men as well.

 

'what's good for the goose is good for the gander' 

Be yourself because an original is worth more than a copy.

(see my specific page: Me & "BeYourself" Message)

 

"In some ways going to the mountains is incomprehensible to many people and inexplicable by those who go. The reasons are difficult to unearth and only with those who are similarly drawn is there no need to try and explain." Joe Tasker British Mountaineer 1948 - 1982

The above quote can easily be applied to many aspects of life where a group does something and others cannot understand. E.g. men in skirts or womens labelled clothing -v- women in trousers or mens labelled clothing for men but womens for women!

I ask that you read this obituary that appeared in the Daily Telegraph on the 24th February 2011. Chris Dale, mountaineer who specialised in bold and new climbs with minimal protection who also loved exploring old mines and solo caved. He also liked wearing 'women's' clothing and purchased them at shops wearing such clothing. Read this article but look deeper into it as you do and just note what Chris Dale was like as a person. He did take the wearing of clothes society deem as womens wear only by adding wigs, make up etc, something I do not do, but it was obviously something he needed to do and why should society say otherwise. He was not doing others any physical harm.

 

Hovingham Hall 20 06 18We are all human beings, with the same feelings, emotions, preferences, and all capable of projecting likes and dislikes. We are all subject to human society brain washing, labelling, stereotyping and placing of expectations on others as individuals and as groups. Many are capable of expecting for themselves, denying others and labelling groups upon the actions of a few.

 

Society on the whole believes not wearing anything that it insists as being 'macho, powerful, dominant' style clothing, which it percieves are styled like or is menswear, is making that individual weak, effeminate etc. I say the person defines the person not what he or she wears.

 

Why under gender equality and gender neutral within clothing it needs to be styled and fashioned on traditional mens attire to be considered as being gender equal, gender neutral? Is this another example of female Matriphobia - the fear of becoming like one's mother?

 

Why not traditional womens style of clothing, or even better a mix and or combination of both traditional mens and womens? 

 

Women in this modern era, certainly since the 1980's now have a mix of both traditional male and female clothing and without question! All reasons for or against a man in a skirt or other clothing society still labels as for women only apply equally to women who now adopt male style clothing when not so long ago society banned and frowned upon such activity. To those who think men like me are queers, faggots, dysfunctional even LGBT then all women who now adopt clothing that is basically from the male wardrobe and what society confines me to must be the same. Metathesiophobia is the fear of change or changing and with regards mens choice of clothing society seems to have this unlike for women.

 

Diversity is the understanding that individuals are unique and recognise their individual differences. It is undertaken by many within their own individual lives and for varying reasons. Taken for granted by themselves for themselves, yet some question the diversity of others. This site concentrates on my clothing preference as a man, just like many other men around the world, mostly hiding behind closed doors. I do not hide though! SkirtedMan and Father Christmas

 

Diversity applies to all and there for all. Even Father Christmas embraces diversity!  

I am a hetrosexual male who is not gender confused, transgender or any other connotation you want to quote. If I am, based upon this logic it applies equally to 99% of the female population who have changed their stereotype expectations and adopt a masculine appearance as well as behaviour and attitude. Society in the current modern era certainly since the 1980's is obsessed with the patriarchy system. Critisises it and rightly so with its oppression towards women but in societies pursuit of equality its solution to me is a fixation on the fundamentals of patriarchy for both sexes. To succeed you must reflect many attributes and past thoughts of patriarchy, in appearance, behaviour and attitude and this is especially prevelant in clothing for both men and women these days. To show or be too feminine and you are considered weak and or inferior and if you question this just look at the overall appearance of both sexes with the clear direction of blurring and general society acceptance of gender roles of each and how many are now very, very similar - but in a patriarchy direction. I have noted several times in my research in men in female labelled clothing that it is OK for women to step up into male style clothing but not OK for men to step down into female clothing.

There is a current drive on Twitter for no gender roles for children. Both to be allowed to mix and match each others society gender expectations and this includes clothing. It is primarliy targetted towards the female sex to shake off society expectations of many aspects of life previously a traditional male activity but they do include the other direction for boys. However, for the adult world of society it is firmly based upon the fundamentals of a patriarchy system for appearance, behaviour and expectations.

 

Sitters & Their Stories. An event I took part in October 2017. My portrait one of four by a professional artist to celebrate diversity and inclusion. This is an official short video of the event. More on this event on the left hand side menus.

 

A few interesting quotes:

"There's no sin like being a woman. When a man dresses as a woman, the audience laughs. When a woman dresses like a man, no body laughs. They just thought she looked wonderful."

Quentin Crisp 1908 - 1999

 

As Archbishop Desmund Tutu said "I am because you are" applying the philosophy of Ubuntu.

 

"...taboos can change swiftly..." and "...like societies of everywhere, we mock the taboos of others yet fail to see the absurdity of our own..."

18th July, 2014  Anne Atkins Thought for the Day - BBC Radio 4.

 

"...you don't need human rights until you need them. Everybody loves their own human rights; it's just other people's that are problematic."

25th October 2014 Shami Chakrabarti part of an interview with The Independent Magazine.

 

"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognise, accept and celebrate these differences."

Audre Lorde American writer, poet, feminist, womanist, librarian, civil rights activist 1934-1992

 

"In a world where you can be anything, be yourself."

Etta Turner 1986-2002 Died 25th November 2002 in a bus accident in Bolivia whilst on a one year student exchange with Rotary International. ettaprojects.org set up in her memory. Etta believed in the power of the individual to effect meaningful change.

 

"It's easy to follow the crowd rather than make your own decisions. Be open, be honest, and be an individual thinker. We have the blueprints of those before us to build our own futures"

Anthony Joshua MBE British Heavyweight Professional Boxer 1989 -

 

"Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent"

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

 

"The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don't know anything about"

Wayne Dyer

 

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind"

Bernard M Baruch: 1870 - 1965

 

 "It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not"

Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951

 

"Evolution has yet to transend that simple barrier. We can care deeply, selflessly about those we know but that empathy rarely extends beyond our line of sight" 

From the film Interstella 2015

 

"The worst kind of loneliness in the world is the isolation that comes from being misunderstood. It can make people lose their grasp on reality." 

From the book Inferno by Dan Brown. The closing sentences of chapter 101.

 

"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself."

 

"Change your mind as often as possible. Just because you thought something yesterday doesn't mean you have to think it today. Don't ever become a prisoner of your own opinion."

Harvey Fierstein 1954 -    American Actor

 

I am a firm believer that individuality, freedom of choice and expression is an absolute must in this modern era for all. Labels, sterotyping of individuals should not apply. Provided no physical harm is done to others. However, in this modern era, this freedom and breaking of society shackles only applies to women, where men are still expected to conform, behave and appear as society has expected for men for the last 200 years.

"The challenge for us is to give each other space to grow and to change. To be different and to see things differently. But does that demand too much of us? Does it require a change of heart and perspective? Is that too much to ask? Christianity teaches it can never be too much, but all to often we fail in that challenge because we demand that others change first. We see the fault in the other but not ourselves. We don't always appreciate the difference in our role of democracy and culture or see it as building a society not diminishing it. History has seen to many attempts to eradicate those who dare to be different but its intolerance of people and ideas that threaten our democracy not difference. Difference brings it to life."

This quote is part of Thought for The Day, BBC Radio 4, 16th June 2017,  by Francis Campbell, Vice Chancellor of St Mary's University, London.

 

On the 2nd June 2017 I came across an article in a popular newspaper which ended with the following quote from Madonna in 2016:

“The fact that people actually believe a woman is not allowed to express her sexuality and be adventurous past a certain age is proof that we still live in an ageist and sexist society. We cannot affect change unless we are willing to take risks by being fearless and by taking the road less travelled by. That’s how we change history.

“If you have a problem with the way I dress it is simply a reflection of your prejudice. I'm not afraid to pave the way for all the girls behind me.”

This was said by Madonna when she appeared in public in a very near 100% see through dress and had negative comments and internet Trolls. I state through out this site, in this modern and open era, individuality, freedom of choice and expression applies to all. This quote was in an article because Amanda Holden had apperared on the ITV Britains Got Talent show in a dress that on the front was as if she was only wearing an unbuttoned cardigan and again negativity was shown. The article was written by a female reporter objecting to the critisism and concluded with the Madonna quote.

These one sided statements defending womens entitlements, rights, expectations, freedom of choice, expression etc are very regular. At times needed. Men on the other hand cannot have this same respect in many areas of life that they expereience discrimination even total disregard (see my section in the menus, left hand side, Men: Advocates for Male Equality)

Feminisim broke the expected labels and sterotypes of women so that they can be seen as individuals. Feminisim speaks of equality but for equality to exist you need it to apply to all - Egalitarian. Take out any reference in the above Madonna quote about women, woman, girls etc and place men, man and boys. The basic ethos of what this quote is aspiring to applies equally. On the same day of this article I had a woman say to me, who asked why I wore skirts adding that womens change but not for men is simply the way society has evolved. She also said she would strongly object to anyone who dictated what she had to wear. This I thought was interesting, she was questioning me! 

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The two women on this photo are very typical. Take their heads off and you would think they were two men, the same style and expectations that men are expected to appear these days in casual mode. When not casual then it is the grey suit or at events, the "penguin suit". These two women passed me several times and each time had to have a giggle. I get far more compliments and people talking to me as a human being than I do negative, but as in all aspects of society there are always those who claim to be perfect yet mock others. I have had on two occasions parents of disabled children laugh at me, and on another occasion a disabled person laugh at me. I have had on a few occasions very obvious Gay and Lesbians laugh at me, yet disabled, Gay/Lesbians make the most noise when not accepted themselves. It is only a very, very small minority who openly make negative representations and none to date ever challenge me negatively directly. Of the small minority it is always 99% women embracing their freedom of choice and expression. I have heard many a man or woman laugh, poke fun or question another person just because that person prefers to be an individual or be different, especially being different to their prefence. Why should I expect anything different for myself or other men in skirts?

Societies negativity towards men in skirts for me is three fold:

1) The obsession of engaging with the fundamentals of patriarchy by appearance, behaviour and attitude as patriarchy is not only critisised but seen as a symbol/label as the means to success and power. Too show Femininity is a failure.

2) Feminism with its demands of equality, freedom, individuality for women yet forgetting this only succeeds when both sexes are included otherwise it is the status quo but gender reversal.

3) Society members are obsessed with their perceived short comings of others but forget to look at themselves.

There is a drive in society these days that to look macho, behave macho is the way to succeed and a requirement, a rite of passage. Your personality and how you behave in life defines you, not your appearance, clothing, job, car, house etc. Society these days is brainwashed into ways of thinking with no diviation from it. The art of being a true individual is rare, "herd" membership the norm.

 

This article dated 24th February 2017 by Lisa Honan is titled Seven Things That Change When Women Wear "Mens" Clothes. She claims they are more comfy and you have far more choice. These two points I disagree with, but when she says you are taken more seriously in mens clothes I can relate to, but I do not get shop Assistants asking me questions as to why I am buying "womens" clothes. She claims you get more pocket storage space and that the world is not ready for women in mens clothes. The latter one I find very interesting as 99% of all women these days do dress in items of clothing that men are still expected to be confined too. Her last point was in mens clothing she gets lots of wonderful comments from strangers and friends. Actually so do I in my "womens" clothes choice as too my wife who is 99% of the time in skirts and dresses.

Lucy Rycroft-Smith has an article "I wore men's clothes for a month - and it changed my life" dated 7th January 2017 on the site the Fword Contemporary UK Feminism. She also wrote another article on 22nd February 2017 "Switching to men's clothing taught me that the world doesn't want women to get too comfortable". Comments on the 7th January 2017 article make interesting reading.

Then we have the opposite problem. A girl who openly wants to be a "Tom Boy" in appearance and behaviour is asked by her education establishments if she is transgender! Up until I read this article (The New York Times 18th April 2017) my experience with society is that society questioned men and boys if they wanted to be an individual, true to themselves, not females but this is a girl being challenged. Society is obsessed pushing others individual perceptions of what others should be, or are, based upon appearance. Please refer to the quotations near the top of this page.

Or as in February 2018 a 7 year old girl Eliza Brichto hit the media when she wrote a letter to Zara offering to model for their boys section as she prefers boys clothes to girl clothes. This had full acceptance within articles and social media as she was empowering herself, an individual, freedom of choice, expression etc. Yet in 2016 when Jaden Smith who openly wears womens clothes as a man and was part of Louis Vitton model photo shoot in what society still labels as womens clothes was met with riddicule and negativity. The usual double standards and yes bigotry within society and clothing just being one area.

I note similar comments from some women time to time on social media complaining bitterly about others should not dictate to them what they can and cannot wear. This one on Twitter, 10th December 2017 I replied too. A may reply to others and not simply ignore as I have done. 

This link is to an article about men in skirts, posted 31st January 2013 on the sensanostra.com. It is on an interview with a fashion student, man in a skirt who wears society labelled womens clothes as a man and questions why soicety gets obsessed when a man takes a stand on society expectations. Sensa Nostra is a human experience archive, building a diverse collection of personal stories, thoughts and outlooks from around the globe. Offering new perspectives on art, religion, sex, drugs, economics, politics, and so much more.

My stance as a man is how I choose to appear with regards clothing. My right, my choice. There are many men out there like this but sadly hide behind closed doors, dare not even let their thoughts and feelings out for fear of society expectations. Many men on a men in skirts forum and other internet outlets openly say they refrain from it for this fear and many even say their wives and partners forbid it yet still claim their freedom of choice. Society is full of hypocracy and bigotry, but I stand up to this and within my own personal life, free myself. I am a better and contented person since than ever before. I note society comments via many media forms on men in skirts but I also note what I expereince within my own life with those I associate with and those who will interact with me.

Clothing should not be gender based, especially in this modern and supposedly open minded and equal society. I accept women who wear trousers and in my view those that look very manly, they have this right. I accept, and always have that neither gender is above each other. We both have respective roles to play and do complement each other. What I do not accept is those who do and then say you cannot.

Our sex is defined biologically by nature. We are either male or female designed for the relevant reasons. However, gender, is a society term for the expected behaviour of male or female and changes with the passage of time. Just look back through history. However, in the modern day era this gender is becoming very blurred and confusing with some claiming rights, many deny others rights yet allow for many. Dress code is one example. Women can wear socks but men frowned upon if wear tights. Women can wear trousers but frowned upon if men wear skirts. Women demand and expect to do male activities, yet it is frowned upon if a man does or chooses to participate in a life style deemed women only to name but some. 

Since the early 1980's I have seen women’s rights and demands in the clothing area never challenged but men who desire to exercise similar rights are. Society these days boxes men into a tight code of expectations, on traditional clothes, macho, rugged and must not show emotion but then are criticised for showing and also not showing understanding and compassion.

 

Our Society has grown into a rigid and complex set of rules to a point that what we wear has to define who we are, what we are and most important of all what others think of us. However women have been allowed to break this expectation yet at the same time society has this apparent ruling that forbids men. In the strict sense of arguments put forward as to why men cannot wear skirts and clothing they feel comfortable in simply reinforces the view point that quite honestly 99% of women are cross dressers themselves.

I have often seen comments made by females in forums on this issue (assuming they are females but that’s the trouble with forums) that men should stop bleating and moaning and just do it if that’s how they feel. I agree with this statement and with my wife by my side this I have done.

Many say a man can wear shorts in hot weather. I have never liked shorts neither jeans. Shorts leave legs open to the sun. Apart from rolling up shirt sleeves I have never been a sun lover. My other response here is that although the majority of women today wear trousers for most of the time I have noticed that many as soon as it gets warm default back to skirts! Why not shorts if they are the cool equivalent of trousers.

 

I have come across the following comment in a forum which I fully agree with, "Macho and feminine is a human label to identify the two feelings. The feelings are set by nature and both are in us all. Females are not ashamed to show the softer side unlike some men who frown upon being labelled as such and act as much as possible to dispel any such comments".

 

You ask why a man cannot wear a skirt and the reply is that a skirt is traditionally women’s clothing. What should a man wear - trousers - but that is one of many male clothing that women have moved into. Men generally frown upon skirt wearing and go very defensive in a macho mood. It is clear that for the majority, society now considers the wearing of a skirt as a backward step, a sign of inferiority and second class citizen. How is it that quite a few men like wearing dressing gowns at home and not just to go between bathroom and bedroom. Why are men at pool sides, beaches and at times other places they are quite happy to be seen with a towel wrapped around their waist.

Throughout this web site I acknowledge womens rights to freedom of choice including clothing, go for it, but remember it does cut both ways. These women are still women and some will still have a feminine personality but it is no different to men like me and others like me. Yes there is a section of females that behave and think as if they are men and yes there are some men who wish to look and act like a woman, but 99% of women who want to show their true feelings and style do so with no negative comment.

Two women living together are just good friends. Two men living together and the initial response is Gay by many, most refine that opinion once the men have ‘proved’ it is not so. Men who want to have the same choice as women are frowned upon. Very one sided.

If you have reached the bottom of this page then I have obviously got you interested. Before moving to other pages on this site watch this 7 min 6 sec video on YouTube. It is by Justin Leconte a Fashion Designer answering a question in a very positive way "why men wear pants and women wear skirts" and basically states we all wore skirts at one time, it is only society dictation that states otherwise. It came to my attention on 1st April 2018.

 

The rest of this site expands on the above in much more detail and at times is direct, blunt and to the point but that is down to society and its selfish and narrow minded attitudes.

AND FINALLY:

10 things to give up -

Excuses

Self Doubt

Fear of Failure

Procrastination

People Pleasing

Fear of Success

Negative Thinking

Negative Self Talks

Judgement of Others

Negative People in Your Circle

Source: @HealingMB  (Twitter)

 

To continue into this site please use the menus on the left hand side. Specifically split into sections, with Men in skirts being the primary section.

 

 The "next" and "previous" buttons on the bottom of each page work on internal ID numbers which are not numeric for the actual next page. It will bring up only the next numeric ID page for this site. To follow each section on the site in order use the left hand side menus throughout. Basically ignore these "next" and "previous" buttons. Must be a failing of free templates!